12 Comments

“And we’ll laugh about it because, goddamn.”

This sentence contains multitudes. You have such a talent for conveying a thousand things in just a few words. So fucking good.

I love everything about this piece, but this particular sentence just slayed me. ❤️

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You have to laugh. I’m glad you’ve got a brother and cousins who have your back. Me and my mom still don’t talk about it because “it’s just a phase.” 50 year phase, Ma! It makes me wish I came out as bi to my Dad, but I tore his biceps in our final arm wrestling contest and I’m not sure his macho ass could’ve handled it.

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I swear to all the gods that I. Do. Not. Fangirl .....and yet

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Yes, thank God for them. This was seriously funny and thank God you can write it now. Seriously good!

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thanks to fuck for the cousin who know the crazy, and discourage strictly unnecessary ass kicking

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Wow! So excellent and spot on. I have great faith in the all accepting next generation. Have fun at the wedding! Time celebrating with family is always special.

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"Put some lipstick on... you'll FEEL better." - my mom, always.

I get it.

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Are there photos of the suit? 😳

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"I know Mom. I fuck them." Thank you. I am dead. That was ... priceless. Your nieces and nephews and most of your sibs are the BEST!

My secret talent is a dead impression of our dad, and my two sibs and I have collections of traumatic-at-the-time-but-sort-of-funny-now quotes from our parents. (Sort of because my goddam therapist refuses to laugh when I tell them the stories, just looks at me all sad eyes and says "that must have hurt a lot" ... Like ffs shut up and laugh ...).

Anyways, as a parent myself, I tried hard, but can't help but wonder which of my lines the kids repeat and laugh about. So many to choose from.

OMG ENJOY PARIS, SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!

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Imagine my horror when my mother wanted me to stand with her at her second marriage wearing a lavender dress. I did indeed look ridiculous. I’m sure my deceased father was smiling.

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Back in 1999, my butch lesbian wife was told to absokutely not to cut her hair before her sister's wedding and was made her wear a bridesmaid's dress. The pictures are hilarious but also sad because she looks so natural with short hair and looks GREAT in a suit. Her mom made a horrible decision on that one.

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This was so fucking relatable. Wow.

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